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tired and bored. Now I was starting to worry, was I doing the right thing, was it really a good time to have this conversation. Suddenly she looked up at me and as soon as she saw me she smiled at me. Her face softened seeing me, it seemed younger. I got my courage back and approached the desk.
"Excuse me miss, but I was wondering if you could spare me some of your valuable time? I need to talk to you about something important to me." Even though I was confident, I was still slightly nervous and Miss Taylor seemed to sense this, she folded the book she was currently working on and put everything aside, giving me her undivided attention. My confidence slowly began to return, Miss Taylor was just the person I thought she is, caring, honest, trustworthy and forthright.
"Sophie, please sit." She pointed to her one to one chair she kept just a few feet from her own chair. I dropped my backpack onto floor and sat down, keeping my back straight, my confidence returned, displayed in my posture. "I am your teacher Sophie, whatever you want to talk to me about, you have both my attention and confidence."
"I really appreciate that. I need to talk to someone about something, that could potentially develop into a problem, mainly at school and I wanted to tell someone I trusted, hoping for, not only there guidance and support, but also needing a friend. I felt of all the people I know here, you were my first and only choice. Do you think it will be alright for you to talk to me, or do you feel that maybe this is something you cannot get involved with because of your position? It is quite personal. Whatever answer you give me, I will not hold it against you, I consider you honest and very trustworthy." Miss Taylor took off her reading glasses, folding them and placed them on the desk. Then she turned her chair so she was directly facing me. Miss Taylor is only a few inches taller than me, has long flowing blonde hair to my curly, shoulder length mousy brown hair. She is currently wearing a yellow summer dress. She gives off a very warm, welcoming feeling, giving my heart a much needed boost. The impression she is giving me is that we are equals, rather than as teacher/student.
"This sounds very serious Sophie and without knowing the problem, I will not be able to give you a straight answer as to what my answer will be. So at this moment in time, with the fact school is finished for the day, I want you to consider me as your friend rather than as a teacher. I also want you to feel comfortable and call me by my first name Amy. Whatever you tell me will not leave this room, unless you tell me otherwise. Im glad you can see me as someone you can confide in, but it
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makes me sad that there is no one else you could think of to discuss your problem or problems with. So when you are ready Sophie, tell me how I can help?"
"Ok Mis... Amy, my secret is I am gay." Suddenly I held my breath, it was out finally, it felt pretty good to finally say it, I had read enough stories about this on the internet, reading peoples testimonies about not only coming to terms with there sexuality, but also the pressures and bigotry a person may face. Admitting or coming out to people was one of the harder steps, as well as admitting it to yourself. Amy just looked down nervously at her feet, she did not say anything for a few minutes. The longer she was silent, the more anxious I felt. Eventually she looked at me seriously and asked "Why are you telling me?" Not at all what I expected her to ask me, so I gave myself a moment to consider my answer.
"One day soon, maybe, students and teachers at this school will find out. I am not the type of person to deny who or what I am. I wanted someone to hopefully support me, just someone I felt I could turn to, a friend. Even though you are my teacher, I trust you above all others and I know you will be there for me, as you have already said, I have your trust. I am sorry if this has put you in an awkward position."
"I feel slightly honoured that you feel that way towards me, and you have my trust. To be honest with you, I hope it is not because you like me as anything more than your teacher. Let me rephrase that slightly, do you feel an attraction to me or see me as some sort of future lover."
"I think you are a very attractive women, but my feelings towards you and my reasons for talking to you about this, are nothing more than as my teacher and my friend. Believe me, I dont feel ready to find a girlfriend at this moment in time. When I feel more comfortable with my sexuality or if I find someone I really care for in that way and that my affections are returned, I may take the next step, I just need a friend, that is all."
"Well thank you again for your trust in me. It sounds like you have had to make some difficult choices, but why have you not told your parents first?"
"At first I was going to, I have a very solid and open relationship with them, but I wanted someone at school to know first. I needed to know that when I do tell my parents, they know I have at least some support and guidance here first, it will at least mean they do not have to worry about what may or may not happen, in a place where they cannot look out for me. Not that
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